Having children makes you humble

We've been memorizing Ephesians 6:24 around here:  "In your anger, do not sin". 

Last night, on our way to a class at church, we were having fun in the car seeing who could remember certain verses.  The last verse we recited as we got out of the car was Eph. 6:24.

After class, I went to the children's area to pick up my kids, and my 3 1/2 year old had this very "guilty" look on his face.  As I went to hug him, he told me, "I have poop in my pants." 

Let me just tell you....we have worked...and worked....and prayed...and scolded...and rewarded...and prayed some more....and rewarded some more....and so on and so on....you get the idea.  THIS issue is my button that will throw me into orbit.  NOT because I'm not willing to work on it.  But because, if you knew my son, you would know he is one of the most head-strong kids you will ever come across.  And on THIS issue, he shines. 

He CAN do it.  He CHOOSES to hold the power. 

So we have gone round and round and round.  Anyway...I digress.

So, last night, I lost my cool.  But instead of yelling...or down-talking him.....I grew cold and silent...and sulked.  He knew I was mad.  My thought process the entire time I was behaving this way, was "I don't want him to do this to PLEASE me.  I want him to make the right choice."  But I stayed angry.   And distant.

I was cold to him as he tried to engage me in conversation on the way home.  I was cold to him as I gave him a bath.  I was cold to him as I dressed him for bed and went to tuck him in.  He didn't challenge me at all.  He knew. 

Once he was in bed, I was going to just simply say his prayer, put him to bed and get out of his room.  I was still too mad to engage with him.  BUT...I decided to go ahead and ask him, "what do you want to pray for tonight?"  He said:  "I want to pray that God will help me be a big boy." 

OH.  My heart melted.  He WANTS to do differently.  He doesn't know HOW to necessarily make it happen on his own.  He GETS it....at least the asking God for help part. 

How precious.  I softened.  And then, just as instantaneously, the Lord brought to my mind, "In your anger, do not sin."...and then, "Let your GENTLENESS be evident to all."  Phil 4:5.  I may not have been harsh, but I was not gentle. At all. 

As we prayed together, we asked God to forgive Mommy for my ungentle response and attitude.  AND we asked God to help my sweet little one to ask for help from a grown-up when he needs to go to the bathroom.  Our hearts are mended. 

Today is a another day.  Thank God His mercies are new every morning.